Thursday, June 25, 2009

The Value Paradigm

Hey guys,

Today, I want to talk about one of the bad thought loops running around the seduction community. The idea that all of life and personal development comes down to the idea of survival and replication value.

What happens usually is that guys find the SUISC after being badly hurt by women or the idea of women. So they want some way to explain the way some women act. At which point they turn to the community and are told that being high value is the key to success in every situation.

This starts a descent into what I like to call the value paradigm. A head space where every move you make is analyzed through the filter of retaining or building social value at all costs. Drug dealing club promoters are now seen as the highest value guys one can get to know. People are sized up for what value they can provide you. Guys who are living by the value paradigm forget about things like being a good person, being happy, and instead chase value anywhere they can find it.

At a conversational level people living in the value paradigm will subtley try to find out how you can help them. This can range from an LA golddigger asking you what kind of car you drive, to a guy asking casually if you know his friend Al who runs such and such bar. Guys in the SUISC who live through the value paradigm viw every second they are not dominating the conversation as if they're losing oxygen. They try really hard to maintain their frames and demonstrate value constantly. They also have a tendency to look try hard when mentioning their travel stories, or ex girlfriends who were strippers in situationally irrelevant manners. They also have a tendency to not be able to vibe without an agenda.

The value paradigm can be a hard one to escape. Especially if you've been in the community awhile. The first step is to purposely choose the lower value option later in an interaction with a woman. Maybe 15-25 mins in make a self deprecating joke, or let the girl lead the conversation for awhile and just ask questions. Small steps can lead to big progress if you are willing to work hard at this and use some common sense.

S

9 comments:

  1. Anonymous10:17 AM

    Yeah, I have seen quite a few people getting fucked up in the head by this and become even more repelling than they were in the first place.

    The key to escape this is to just RELAX and become a CHILL person and not making such a big deal out of everything

    ReplyDelete
  2. This is what drew me to your game material sinn. while other puas teach guys to change themselves to get girls, you teach guys how to BETTER themselves to get girls

    ReplyDelete
  3. reminds me of the girls that are hot but simply cannot carry a conversation. they've been taught that being hot and standing there is enough, that it will get them by. when you ask them something like "what are you passionate about?" they don't even have an answer.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Greaaaaattttt Sinnn!!!! I'm one of these value paradigm guy. Everytime I go out I feel the need to sarge and therefore I can't get in to the state, because I keep trying hard to make qualifying questions or statement, or to make the conversation goes as perfect as possible. This is such a mind blowing article!! Thanks!!

    Best pal,
    Steven ;)

    ReplyDelete
  5. I like this article, as it touches on something many people don't think about. I think a lot of the stuff guys learn that is meant to be guidelines ends up becoming too much of a deal to the detriment of the individual. Again, excellent post.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Anonymous1:26 PM

    Glad you posted this. I think this is something that the community and really the whole MM model got wrong as far as Value and displaying value IE telling a story about how you and your friends had a car chase to protect your striper GF. I've found in life that the people who I know who have the most 'value' are the one's who talk about it the least. I know a go who is a multple emmy winner who basically just introduces himself as a writer and then when pushes says he's written for a few shows... when the girls get to his house see he has a shelf full of awards it just takes everything to another level... True value means you dont have to talk about it.

    ReplyDelete
  7. gold, as always.
    SINN IS THE MAN

    ReplyDelete